Your Body Is Not A Disneyland Part 8: The Morning After, or It’s Really Not You, but I’ve Gotta Go
Posted on 2, November 2010
It has been a long road, but this will be the last post in my series about sex and how we treat our bodies, and just look where our fling has taken us. We started out in Part 1 with the sex talk, in Part 2 talked about love, Part 3 became lost in the throws of passion, Part 4 took a road trip with Vanessa in our guest post, had to stop and do our homework in Part 5, became distracted by the TV and media in Part 6, our real, feel, and ideal in Part 7, and now it is the morning after, and I have gotta go. I am feeling smothered.
In all seriousness, where has this journey taken us? Well, for as long as time has been ticking we have been and will continue to be beings that are anthropologically, genetically, physically, emotionally and spiritually driven to engage in sexual relationships with others. That has not been the issue of this series. I am all for people having sex. The issue is how we go about pursuing sex and how, in many ways, we have become slaves to our cultural beliefs, attitudes, behaviors and language of sex. IMHO, sex is one of the most sacred experiences in which we can engage with another person, and it is important that we see it that way for ourselves and others to preserve our self-respect and others’. Probably the most important subtext to this series has been the effect of our attitudes and the influence of various cultural issues on our kids. Honestly looking at all of these factors when it comes to ourselves, it is the influence of our issues on our kids is often the hard part.
Lost and Found Along the Way
It has not been my goal to come across as judgmental, nor holier than thou. I am not taking a religious nor political point of view; I am more focused on the health of our collective spirit. Sometimes in life, we become distracted by that which looks and feels inviting. This is not always in our best interest.
Life offers many distractions and temptations and so many things become a part of these distractions: work, play, relationships, television, internet, the media, drinking, drugs, social life, how we look, who likes and loves us… Many of these things I have touched on, and one of the common denominators of all these issues is often sex. It is ultimately up to us to take responsibility for what we focus on. It is my sincerest hope that you have grown through this exploration. These are some of the issues that I would like you to consider when considering your choice, not just in sex, but in life:
- Are we making the choice that brings us instant gratification, or making choices that look at our long-term best interest?
- Are our actions dishonoring our self and our soul, or are we loving, respecting and honoring ourselves?
- Are we looking for a quick fix, or are we truly looking for intimacy?
- Are our behaviors and attitudes carelessly affecting our children, or are we careful about what they see and hear?
- Are we indifferent to our children’s awareness and attitudes about sex/life, or if we are invested in what they are learning and doing?
I hope these become guidelines for you to use in your everyday life to help direct your choices for you and those you guide. Never forget the power that you have in what you create. No matter what you do create, do it from a place of love, and let that become its foundation. After all, amusement parks can be enjoyable when we ride them safely. When I’m done with this blog, I am going to Disney World.
I hope you will take the following pledge and will allow this to become a part of your everyday living.
I pledge to learn more about love, what it truly is and truly isn’t. I agree that sex is not love, but instead can come from a place of love. I agree to honor, my body, mind and soul and commit to the intention of acknowledging my mistakes in the context of sex and love and to learn and grow from them. I understand that to err is human and forgive myself and others is Divine.
I understand that sex is not a shameful or guilty act, and also acknowledge that sex, intimacy, trust and love belong hand-in-hand-in-hand-in-hand, and one without the others may not honor the creator’s intended design. I understand that it is my place to find my power and ability to love myself from within and will honor others as I honor myself.
Sex is not intended to be a vehicle of power, status or control, but a vehicle of love and connectedness that is the culmination of a respectful and healthy relationship based in Agape, Eros and Philos. I owe this commitment to myself, those I love, and those I will love.